Ryan has been gone for 6 days!! He is coming home today and I only share this because often times we momma's think we're all alone in our craziness.....we're NOT!!
Ryan left on Tuesday morning. I had a great attitude and I was ready to tackle this "gig" all by myself and I was going to keep this great attitude all week. He travels often so it's not new to me but when he's gone a length of time, it does break down the balance in our house and when "they" know I'm alone and weak, they seem to attack all at once!!
Tuesday morning I went to bible study. Great way to start my week with my hubby away. I had a great time! I was motivated! I had lunch with my neighbor. Couldn't wait to pick the kids up from school (almost)!! That was the first of three days that I cried. Yes, I cried!!!! I picked up Emma and the drama started. Something about school and friends and then a "freak out" about a form I didn't sign that SHE ASKED ME TO SIGN the night before. I calmly said, "If you noticed that it wasn't signed, you should have asked again. You need to be responsible for your own stuff." I'm NOT going to lose it!
We get home and my phone rings. I forgot to send Sophia with her permission slip for her Girl Scout field trip. While I'm on the phone, I notice two piles of dog doo doo IN THE HOUSE....and they are not firm in consistency! The tears are coming but they aren't here yet. I get off the phone to another phone call from my daughter, Olivia's BFF. I answer because it must be an emergency. NO, it's a scam to have a play date on DAY ONE of my solo gig. We have horseback riding and volleyball today so it's a NO! She pushes back and I'm getting stressed. I state the obvious answer...."We'll see!!" WHY OH WHY do I EVER say THAT?!?!?!?
All the kids come home. Sophie is crying because she didn't get to go on her field trip. I'm cleaning up dog doo doo!!! Olivia is begging for a playdate and Emma comes out to PROVE to me that I didn't sign her form. The tears start falling! I can't help it. I'm totally overwhelmed and it's day ONE of a SIX DAY "gig" as single mom. OMG!!!! I start crying and yelling, my neighbor comes to save the day. I cry harder. I want to just have a good cry. I'm totally defeated even though I do this all of the time. Sometimes things just seem magnified and this is one of those times.
So, that was day one and this is day six! I had some really precious moments this week. Both with my kids and without. I had lunch with another friend, my cousin and her two angels came to visit for 2 days, and I had a night out with friends. I even went to another bible study on Thursday. I really have so much to be thankful for. I experienced TONS of tender moments with the kids at the end of the night BUT it's just hard being a parent. I literally cried 3 times this week. I would go to bed defeated and wake up refreshed:)
That's the good news, I guess. God never gives us more than we can handle and I can handle this!! I had a Grandmother tell me yesterday that someday I will miss all this chaos. I will actually miss the NOISE, the FIGHTING, the DRAMA!!! Can you imagine that? But I think she's right. I will continue to take it one day and a time and just do my best. And I must add, the days I cried.....the kids were REALLY good!! I might get an Academy Award for my new tearful pleas.......I hope they aren't on to me!!!
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